It may be a federal crime, but that hasn’t stopped weed aficionados from trying, over and over again, to roll the world’s biggest joint.
It’s kind of a hopeless task. There’s no official group to determine which is the biggest. And the hefty ones tend to wind up in the hands of cops before they can be measured.
It basically boils down to a question of who can get the most attention for his or her massive doobie. Media play is everything, more important than the actual size. If you can land a YouTube clip showing you with a joint that’s among the biggest, you’ve got it made.
If anything, the lack of consistency has opened the field to pros and amateurs alike. When you don’t know what record you’re trying to break, you just put together the biggest joint you can manage.
In that spirit, here’s a list of the three marijuana cigarettes that are supposedly the biggest.
Party-goers at an April 20 marijuana festival at UC Santa Cruz pooled some of their weed and attempted to roll the biggest joint they could. Weighing in at 2.5 pounds, the market value of this 4-foot monster was estimated at $5,000 to $6,000. It may be the current record-holder.
Sadly, students never got to spark the thing. Cops swooped in and confiscated it because possession of that kind of weight is considered a violation of California’s medical marijuana law.
Thankfully, there were no arrests, though it’s not as if that eased the pain of losing so much pot.
A man was booted from Hempfest in Seattle last year after he tried to claim the record for world’s biggest J. He didn’t make it that far, but he set his sights high: He brought a 20-foot piece of rolling paper.
Brian Laoruangroch asked festivalgoers to contribute one gram each. He would have needed multiple people holding the joint just to keep it aloft. Imagine trying to light the thing. You’d need a flamethrower.
Laoruangroch’s own people kicked him out: Hempfest’s organizers called the cops on him as he tried to wrangle fellow tokers into his plan. Staff said the man was about to commit a federal felony in the middle of the fairgrounds.
Participants at the 19th annual Cannabis Cup competition smoked this giant through tubes. Unfortunately, things didn’t work out as intended: The doobie fell to pieces after less than a minute.
The thing was a bit thin to begin with, but it was definitely one of the longest of all time, several feet. And unlike so many other attempts, this one was partially successful: They did get to smoke some of the J, after all.
Of course, records are made to be broken, even the ones that aren’t really records. Creative tokers across the country are always thinking of the next opportunity to roll a joint that requires steel reinforcement. Let’s hope, for all our sakes, that they succeed.