There’s a dilemma most serious stoners face at some point in life. You’re on a first date, you’re really hitting it off, and then you realize that after an hour of conversation, you still have no idea if your date smokes pot.

First DateThat’s not a big deal to most people in the larger world, who can easily just quit the weed if need be. But what if you’re a patient and use daily? Or what if you’re just a huge pothead and have no desire to cut back? For these people, the do-I-bring-it-up conundrum is very real.

So what to do? Should you broach the sticky subject on a first night out? Here are a couple of points of view.

Don’t risk spoiling the date

The argument for talking about weed is pretty simple. If you smoke heavily and your date doesn’t toke at all, things probably won’t go anywhere fast. Cutting to the chase could end a waste of a relationship before it even starts.

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There are websites that attempt, with limited success, to pair stoners with other stoners, a sort of OKCupid for the green set. The problem is, these networks are primitive at best and attract few users. Potheads looking for potheads can probably do just as well at 3 a.m. on Craigslist.

Person-to-person contact is still the best way to find others in your area who like to spark up – and maybe fall in love. Which brings us back to the central argument: It has to come up some time.

And who knows? It may take a few wasted dates, but eventually you’re bound to get a positive response. There are lots of stoners in the world, and they often look nothing like stoners.

Can be better to avoid broaching the matter

Share SmokeOf course, there are equally important reasons to let the subject be, at least until a second date. For one thing, it’s usually best to avoid serious topics on a first meeting. This is a chance to scratch the surface and see if there might be chemistry. Sharing your love for dope might not be the best idea.

Part of the problem is that smoking a lot of grass is one thing; talking about it incessantly is another. Even if your date is totally down with your habit, he or she may not consider it a worthy topic for a first impression. They’d rather smoke up with you than listen to you talk about smoking up.

Naturally, some dates go better – and faster – than others. If there’s a physical spark and things are clearly headed for the bedroom, it’s best to acknowledge your love of pot before your date’s nose reaches your place.

Best case scenario: Your date beats you to the punch and admits to his or her own marijuana use. That way you can both just relax and maybe plan to share a J before parting ways. Otherwise, you’re just going to have to play it by ear.

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