Most people who would fit into the category of “stoner” usually have no trouble identifying themselves as such. However, some people may have doubts as to whether or not they belong in that category. Still others wish they could be stoners, but aren’t quite sure if they fit the mold. Regardless of what category you belong in, this list should give you a clue as to whether or not you belong to the stoner flock.
1. You partake alone
The mark of a true stoner is the ability–or preference–to get stoned alone. Most people who do not have much experience with marijuana would rather get high in a group, or at least with a friend. This is actually preferable in most cases, but a true stoner can–and often does–get stoned alone.
2. You speak the language
Stoners have their own special language that few outside the stoner world understand. Terms such as “bud”, “shake”, “schwag” and the like add a lot of color to the stoner subculture, but they also help identify strains, varieties, and qualities of marijuana.
3. You have your own glass piece
Pipes made from aluminum foil, carved out of apples, or fashioned from a soda can are perfectly fine–if you’re in college. As you get older however, you really should invest in a respectable glass piece.
4. You light up everyday
When you think about it, there really isn’t any good reason to not smoke everyday…and many good reasons to do so. Stoners are well aware of this, although they really don’t need any good reasons to light up.
5. You are routinely high in front of family members
Most stoners don’t even stress being high in front of their parents. Eye drops, showers, and breath mints take care of the most obvious signs of being high. Besides, if you’ve been a stoner long enough, your parents probably won’t be able to tell the difference!
6. You absolutely have to smoke before you do anything or go anywhere
Although stoners don’t need a good reason to smoke up, any event is a good reason to smoke up! Heading out on a Friday night? Going to the ball game? Staying home? All good reasons to have a smoke!
7. You appreciate pictures of good weed
Something about pictures of good bud just seems to grab the attention of stoners. Call it ‘bud porn’ if you will, stoners just have an appreciation for it!
8.You enjoy smoking outdoors
Smoking and the outdoors just go together, and true stoners take every opportunity to light up when under the big blue sky.
9. You don’t do typical ‘stoner’ things just it prove you’re a stoner
True stoners are comfortable in their own skin, and they don’t have to resort to the typical stonerisms in order to prove anything. Rasta colors, dreads, and pot leaf emblazoned t-shirts are for wannabes. True stoners don’t bother with all that.
10. You don’t cough
The quickest way to tell a wannabe from a true stoner is coughing. Maybe it s a combo of not wanting to and not having to, but stoners simply don’t do it!